Dranged Dungeons

The Good, the Bad, and the Gender Confused


When we last left our heroes, Danor and Wyran had just busted a small portion of their party from jail for Vigilantism. When threat after threat fell on his deaf ears, Danor was able to diplomatically resolve the situation, thus ensuring future relations, and rewards, from the authorities within the city of Phlan.

(Queue Theme Song and Opening Titles)

Upon receiving payment for taking out the cultists and the additional gold, handed to them very begrudgingly by the wonderful and ever so friendly Lt. Alaban Gorrin , collected from the thieves, we meet up with our heroes once again in Broken Phlan at the site of the newly re-opened Danderly’s Dairy and Alehouse to discuss the job “offer” from Lt. Gorrin to investigate news of Barbarian tribes overtaking the nearby Dwarf Fortress.

Given three days to prepare and hire employees to keep watch over Danderly’s while on assignment the party takes to renovations and stockpiling before setting off early.

The road to the Dwarven Fortress seems pretty uneventful other than a mysterious blockade just outside of the city, false rumors of a plague, and a murder mystery involving missing children, their dead parents, a pub, an attractive woman on a quest for treasure, an old woman who happens to be a man dressed as an old woman living in the basement of a pub making puppets from said missing children he/she/it has been keeping behind a secret door which is so well hidden only a Barbarian such as Draug is able to find it.

In the end, the party saves the day and offers the town mayor an opportunity to franchise as Danderly’s hopes to expand outside of Phlan.

Needless to say the heartbroken community turns the offer down, and all but runs our heroes out of town, without so much as a thank you. At least Cee was able to save some skull shaped souvenirs from the debacle.

It was not a complete loss however, as Dourif finds the love of his life…again, and one possible merchant contact is made, although a couple of our heroes find it sensible to break into the man’s home, steal his gold along with some opened mail he had lying around before setting out on the road again with a new temporary party member/Dourif’s girlfriend. ;-)

With the information given to them by Dourif’s new lady love, the party enters the Dwarven Fortress from the rear where, after making their way through the cavernous tunnels, come upon the sound of banging rocks and a shit load of dwarves chained together banging on those rocks. The party takes no time in deciphering that the dwarves banging on the rocks was in fact what was causing the sound of banging rocks to echo through the caves.

In order to free the dwarven prisoners, who look like they haven’t eaten or had a sip of ale in weeks, the party must first defeat a large shirtless crew of axe wielding barbarians and their Longbow Brand Javelin™ tossing orc companions, who apparently are so good at hurling javelins that the slight in height, yet brawny in stature, Fred Danderly himself nearly meets his end by not one, but six Longbow Brand Javelins™.

However after clearing out a few of the less than hearty barbarians the party recovers and cleans up the cavern, freeing the dwarves, before skulking back into the caves to rest up for Round 2 with the barbarian horde.

How will the party fair in the inevitable battle to liberate the dwarves and acquire the treasure hunted by Ms. Saffron Dourif? Tune in next week for the continuing adventures of …

“Above the Law: Private Security”


drangedlark jcrohn

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